Laura's chucked a wobbly

Laura works on my floor, she is a recalcitrant photocopier who arrived wrapped in plastic, Laura has attitude. The following excerpts from our office email list will give you an idea of Laura's personality:

Laura's sleeping in...

Laura is missing a part that keeps the hole in the Ozone layer stable- The part has been ordered, ETA unknown.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news …. I’ve changed the toner … and it wont’ accept the new cartridge … can
someone come fix it?

Do not use LAURA as we have no yellow toner

Dear IT
We have an enormous problem. The magenta on Laura is gone. Please come and fix it now.

Does anyone else work with an anthropomorphic photocopier?